My Million-Dollar, Money Making Idea

So, two of my very dear friends are getting hitched in less than 18 hours so I want to take the opportunity to say Congratulations BD & JC!

Being involved in this wedding stuff has opened my eyes to quite possibly the best money making idea ever.

Rent-a-Parents.

Not because they need to do this. Both sets of their parents are Amazing! Well put together, handsome, polite, socially graceful. But I began thinking about my nuptials...

It made me realize that I'm going to need to rent parents. At least until after I'm hitched and the poor sap that has agreed to spend the rest of his creation avec moi is contractually bound to me. Then I can break out my real parents.

I love my parents. I really honestly do. They both have lots of great qualities.

There is just a smidge of apprehension on my part when exposing them to the general public and a great amount of apprehension and anxiety when exposing them to a potential suitor. Hence,

I would rent parents. Their names would be Judy and George. They would be normal, hard-working people. Nothing too special. Judy would be crafty and George would play guitar.

Surely there are other people out there who would rather not inform their parents of upcoming nuptials. I'm seriously thinking of keeping mine in the dark until I'm squirting out the grandchild they're both so desperate to have.

"Hi Mom, I'm squirting out your grandchild. You may want to come and catch the placenta or something. But by no means is anyone eating it."